The 10 Commandments – Accordin’ to a Southener

Howdy, folks!

This post was borrowed from another blog, “Sweet Tea and Magnolias”, one which I co-own. Well, I post maybe once a year, but my name is on there, if nothing else 🙂 Anyway, STaM focuses on our Southern heritage, Southern humor and Southern lore, and it’s certainly worth stopping by! Check in on us HERE.

Anyway, this is a post that my “adopted brother”, Samuel, wrote. 🙂 Enjoy!

Howdy, I just want to let you know who I am… Samuel Joel Dye is the name and mighty glad to meet you.  Anyways, I was raised a pastor’s kid and been called to the mission field. I will be heading off to Bible college in the next year or so. Hopefully they don’t kick me out for my “vernacular” interpretation of the 10 Commandments. Anyways, ya’ll be good and read yer bible every day (oh, and don’t forget to pray)…

The 10 Commandments:

1. Thar ain’t sopost to be no gods afore Him.
2. Ya’ll not sopost to make any idols… nun whut-so-evar!
3. Usin’ tha Lord’s name in vain ’round here.. that’ll get you strung up.
4. You’d better be thar fer Sunday meetin’.
5. Honor yer Maw ‘n’ Paw.
6. No killin’ nobody (lest it be in self-defence).
7. Ain’t sopost be no foolin’ around with a gal that you ain’t hitched to.
8. Takin’ what ain’t yurs… that’ll get ya shot.
9. No tellin’ tall tales or short ones for that matter.
10. Don’t be hankerin’ for yer buddy’s stuff.